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'"A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table. "One day,little Timmy was at school and heard the word “shit”.
Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands: "Dear, Dad. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. He went home and asked his dad for the definition and he promptly told him “coats and jackets”.
It writhed in pain for a moment, then quickly sank to the bottom and died.
"Now kids, what lesson can we derive from this experiment? Little Johnny raised his hand and wisely responded, "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!
A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...." The blonde replies, "Oh my God!
The principal tells her to send Johnny to him the next time he shows up late. Johnny says, "I was two hours early today so I had time to fish in the pond on my way to school. If I didn't clean it and freeze it, my mom would've been angry. The teacher promptly takes him to the principal's office and explains the story to the principal.
He will tell Johnny a lie so big that he will never tell another one. The principal tells Johnny about his own trip to school that day.
Q: What does it mean when your boyfriend is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? Never mind, you won't get it." Q: How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck ?
A: At least a zit waits until you're a teenager before it cums on your face! Never mind, its too long." Girl: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Q: What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?
"Little Johnny is constantly late for school and what's worse is that he always has a big lie explaining why.